20 Women were asked to give advice to other women in their 20s. This is what they said:
1
The advice I would like to share with women in their 20’s would be:
1. Don’t Compromise your values or goals.
2. Learn to trust your instincts and don’t be swayed by your feelings.
3. Be sure to connect to the right people.
Most importantly look within & be true to yourself !!!
2
Friends are rolling stones. This was the hardest lesson to learn in my twenties. Every girl wants to accumulate that perfect circle of girlfriends ( a la Sex and the City) who gather on Sunday mornings for gossip and brunch, who party Vegas style on Saturday nights, and who keep our secrets and dry our tears while shopping for cute Kimonos. So when we see a precious friend exiting stage left we panic, we cling, we try to re-work the friendship or change who we are. Nine out of ten times its not worth it, simply the friendship had expired, or someone has evolved and grown out of the friendship. I know it hurts but believe me there’s truth in the reason, season, and lifetime saying. The lifetime people are not going anywhere and those are the ones who will slay a dragon for you.
-Maria “Vida” Billini
Age 32
New York City
Founder of Verbal Acrobatics/ Blogger/ Poet/ Hostess
Email: Vidabpoetics@gmail.com
http://vidaandthecity.tumblr.com/
https://www.facebook.com/VerbalAcrobatics
3
For anyone who may find him or herself stuck in a bad relationship or worse, in a cycle of choosing the wrong person to get involved with. Starting today, stop wasting time and energy on someone who does not love you! Instead put all of that energy into building yourself up. Invest in loving yourself. As I stated in one of my previous blog postings, “be your own best friend.”
-Cheryl Jaques
New Orleans
Registered Nurse
4
It’s important to be an entrepreneur. Find out what you are the best at in regards to your field and sale it. Teach it, share it! Don’t be stingy with your craft! Allow it to be lucrative for yourself. Know and trust that you are knowledgable in your craft, and when you hear that little voice of insecurity that says you can’t, tell it to shut up because its only the devil trying to stop you from being undeniable!
-Valeka J Holt
31
MFA Acting University of Washington
5
By age 20, I want all young ladies to know that they should have a life-plan that will have them educated, strong and independent of any man, love interest that may come along. Do not depend on someone taking care of you, be able to take care of yourself! Love your partner but always love yourself more! One more thing…If a young women is in an abusive relationship, just because you are young and you feel as though you may not be able to survive without him. Leave even if he hit you only once! Your life may depend upon your decision. Love does not hurt!
-Ms. Geri Davis
LSU School of Medicine Outreach Coordinator
When I was in my 20’s I wish…that someone told me that my identity was not attached to a man. That being needy was not away to get or keep a man and that being strong was not a sign of weakness.
-Darlene Hunter
Motivational Speaker
7
You are your biggest investment. Everyday is a new day to becoming a better you. So, buy stock into your mind, body, soul and spirit. And, keep those of substance around who deposit into your essence.
-Demetria Jennings
Age 36
New York City
Coordinator of Private Equity Research
8
I got married young. I’m not against getting married at a young age but I was a victim of domestic violence and verbal abuse. I learned through that if he hits you once leave right away. Don’t stay in a situation to “keep” your family together. It does not stop! I also learned to never change who I am to the point that I lose my identity to appease a man. Thirdly it’s important to really get to know the man’s family. A woman can learn a lot about a man by understanding the family he comes from. That foundation is a factor in what helped to shape the man he is today, whether it be good or bad. Taking your time to get to the root of who he is by getting to know the family first can avoid a young woman a lot of heartache and pain and avoid bringing children into a situation that isn’t conducive to their welfare. Once you tell yourself that you deserve all the good that life has to offer anything that doesn’t fit into that equation has got to go.
–Raina Williams-Rogers
Celebrity licensed hairstylist/makeup artist
Age 33
New York City
Twitter: TheGlamourBOXny
9
“I wish I’d known how to love myself better in my 20’s. Loving you means not comparing yourself to other women. You can only be you so find one thing you like about yourself and werk that !!! Learn to like your brain, your quirky personality, that boob that’s bigger than the other one, love all of it!! Cosmetic, pharmaceutical and many other industries make billions everyday by making us feel that we are not good enough. The truth is we are more than enough. There is not one other you on the planet !!!! Do you know what that means??? When you know what you’re working with- your whole life will change!”
–Zoe Flowers
New York City
Reiki Master, Poet, Playwright, Tarot / Intuitive Reader, Domestic Violence expert New York
Twitter @divinebydesigne & @soulrequirements
Highestgoodconsulting.orgHighestgood.wordpress.com
10
Never co-sign or put something in your name for anyone! Make working out & eating healthy apart of your daily lifetime regiment. Try meditation. Travel. Don’t compare yourself to other women just be the best you can be.
-Rocsandra Seigle
Hair Stylist
Age 33
New York City
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Love this!
I turned 25 this summer and all I could think was “I’m five years from 30 and I’m single and still at my parents” even my girlfriends who are a bit younger than I made me feel like my time was up. Although they were joking it still stung. Everything these women have said is speaking to me directly. I don’t have it all together but I am on a path somewhere. The not knowing where excites me. Seeing where I wanna be inspires me.
One piece of advice that I would share with a young lady in her 20’s would be do not be in a rush to get married, “LOVE YOURSELF”. Along with that do not give up who you are to be in a relationship.
Great advice!!